Is there an area of your life that you just can’t seem to
A change that you want to create for yourself but are afraid
to take that first step?
Are you aware of resistance in an area of your life that’s
holding you back and are looking for that bit of help to break through?
By overcoming resistance you can live the life you are meant to live.
got three steps that will help you.
It’s a part of life. We can resist feeling emotions, resist
taking action, resist moving forward. We can even judge ourselves for our
We may be resisting so much that we can’t quite identify
what we are resisting. Sometimes it just feels like being stuck.
Here’s the thing, resistance can and will hold you back if
you don’t do the work of dissolving it so that you can move forward.
So, let’s look at how you can begin to gently lean into the
resistance and begin to move through it without judgement.
The Triple A
The three steps to dissolving resistance are: awareness,
I was fortunate to be in the audience of a discussion with Iyanla
Vanzant in which she called these the ‘triple AAA’. It’s a process that helps
move you through difficult emotions.
We begin with awareness because you have to be aware
of the resistance to start the process of moving through it. With awareness you
can begin to do the work.
The next step is acknowledgment. You must acknowledge
what you’re resisting without judgement. By acknowledging it you shine the
light on what you’re resisting. And, as they say, sunlight is the best
The final step is acceptance. You must accept the
situation as it is in this moment without judgement. It won’t always be the way
it is now but it’s important to accept it the way it is, warts and all.
Let’s Step into It
Find a place where you can sit quietly. Use your journal if that
helps you process. Put it on the schedule. Give your partner notice that you
need time for you. Take this time to prioritize yourself.
Ready? Probably not and that's okay.
Step 1 - Awareness - Identify an area where you feel
resistance, a strong emotion, or an action that you aren’t making progress on. Lean
into the feeling.
How does it feel to focus on the area of resistance?
It’s okay if it feels yucky, keep focus.
Step 2 - Acknowledgment – Put your hand on your heart
and name what you’re resisting. Use one of these phrases; “I acknowledge that I
feel _____, “this is resistance to______”, “this is fear”, “this is me not wanting
to move forward because____”, “I feel
How does it feel to acknowledge it?
Offer yourself compassion for acknowledging. Do not judge
yourself for what you are resisting, it won’t help the situation.
Step 3 - Acceptance – Now accept the situation as it
is now, without judgement. It can sound like this, “I accept that I feel _____”,
“I accept this situation of _____”, “today I accept _____ but it won’t always be
like this”, “I forgive myself for ____”.
Notice how acceptance feels. Offer yourself forgiveness if
it is needed.
Do you have more space between you and the resistance?
Can you move forward?
If not, it’s okay, repeat the process a few times.
Remember to put aside judgement, forgive yourself for what
you didn’t know before you knew it, give yourself time to unlearn old conditioning and learn new information.
It’s a Practice
It’s a practice, a system, that you can use when resistance
or those challenging emotions show up in your life. Repeat the steps as many times as you need to until the resistance subsides.
With these steps you have a new tool to work through the
resistance so that you can move forward more freely with the life you are meant
Now that you’ve cleared some of the resistance, what can you
move forward on?
Go live the life you are meant to live!